Please Show Your Tickets Before Entering The Ocean And Don't Forget To Visit The Gift Shop On Your Way Out

Not that long ago we wrote a little piece about the new underwater museum being constructed in Playa Blanca, Lanzarote. The Atlantic Museum is the work of British Artist, Jason deCaires Taylor. Jason is a former theatre set designer, sometime Paparazzi photographer and scuba diver, who hit on the idea of sinking statues in the ocean for other bubble blowers to look at. Now we had some problems with the whole idea and you can read about them in the original post here.

To summarise, we disagree with the idea of dumping statues into the sea. In fact we disagree with the whole notion of creating man-made diving sites by deliberately sinking ships, dumping cars or giant concrete blocks into the ocean altogether. Yes, we understand the argument around eco-tourism, marine conservation and creating sites to draw bubble blowers away from fragile reefs etc. But understanding the argument is one thing, agreeing with the solution that Jason deCaires Taylor and others have come up with is quite another.

For one thing, as we stated in the original post, the creation of these arty installations come at a cost and that cost must be recouped. This means there has to be a charge for anyone wishing to view them. Then of course, once the costs have been recouped, someone, possibly Jason, will want to make a profit. This means the charge will be indefinite and will probably rise year on year. But how do you charge someone for going in the ocean? The installation at Playa Blanca, is not that far from the shore and it would be quite easy for divers, freedivers and snorkellers to reach the location by swimming from the beach. The answer they have come up with at Lanzarote is to create an exclusion zone around the installation. An exclusion zone patrolled by a dedicated security boat. And before anyone comes up with the ludicrous idea that the boat is there to stop the statues being stolen... We'd like to point out that Jason's workshop on the island has an easily accessible yard where the statues are created and stored prior to being sunk into the sea. This yard has no security! So if they were worried about the statues being stolen, this would be the place that you'd think security would be needed. No. The security is there to stop people who haven't paid getting into the site. The ocean ladies and gentleman has effectively been privatised for profit. And as we pointed out before, it won't be long before someone, somewhere gets the idea that if they can charge for viewing one section of the ocean they might be able to charge for all of it. Want to dive from the beach? That'll be 10 Euros please. Going for a snorkel? That'll be 7 Euros. Just fancy a paddle in the sea? Sorry but there is a beach usage charge I am afraid – 5 Euros. And you won't be able to complain either as the charge will be wrapped up nicely with eco-tourism paper and tied with a nice conservation bow – various colours are available. And who can argue with that? Conservation costs you know?

The museum exclusion zone and security boat

Then there is the preposterous assertion that the statues might in some way highlight the plight of refugees, dolphins or society's attitude to global warming. Such assertions go beyond being pretentious and are quite simply absurd arty nonsense. No tourist, diver, snorkeller or even Easybreath Mask wearer is so dumb that they cannot understand the news and can only gain understanding by viewing grey concrete representations of the issues facing the world that have been sunk in the oceans... Alright, maybe Easybreath Mask wearers might be that dumb but the rest of us aren't.

The fact is that such installations are deeply distressing. If you are the type of diver, snorkeller or general tourist who thinks that glaring at concrete sculptures in twelve metres of bluish water is a wonderful experience that satisfies your combined need for conservation, artistic culture and current affairs then the Underwater Museum of Jason deCaires Taylor will be right up your alley. And you won't mind paying for the privilege either because as the saying goes, a fool and his money is easily parted. If on the other hand, you would rather spend your precious underwater time observing the brilliant, amazingly diverse, natural wonders of the ocean (and are capable of understanding news and TV reports about global issues without the assistance of a mime artist, painter or even sculptor giving you a representation) then we suggest that you give these underwater eyesores a miss. Just remember though, that it won't be too long before the money men start casting their gaze towards you. The idea of the ocean being a free and wondrous environment for all may just have had its day and how depressing is that?

One last thing. According to the International Council of Museums, a museum is defined as: A non-profit, permanent institution in the service of society and its development, open to the public, which acquires, conserves, researches, communicates and exhibits the tangible and intangible heritage of humanity and its environment for the purposes of education, study and enjoyment.

We don't think that Jason deCaires Taylor's Atlantic Museum in Playa Blanca, meets that definition. So probably shouldn't call itself a museum then. A better title would be underwater art exhibition. 

The bodies pile up in Jason's very accessible yard